Lenox African

Lenox African

Zimbabwe-style coalition in new UK government?

By Lenox Mhlanga

As much as I hate them, politicians run the world and worse still, make the decisions that make living such a pain sometimes. We are forced to keep a close watch on their antics and weep at their mistakes which invariably result in disastrous consequences. We take the brunt and wish for an early election to clean up the mess. However, elections do not always come up with the solutions that we yearn for.

Take those held in Zimbabwe as an example. The government prides itself with holding timely elections. It's an achievement that has been touted by the former ruling Zanu PF to demonstrate that they were truly democratic. Bar the fact that all these so called democratic elections were seriously flawed. The playing field has never been level, and the party in question has so perfected the art of rigging that the people wonder whether any truly free and fair elections were possible in the Southern African country.

On the few occasions when the elections nearly returned an unanticipated result for the ruling party of course, the authorities defied any pretence of shame by ensuring that the will of the people never saw the light of day. On one notable occasion in 2008, the person charged with running the elections to the results and literally ran for the hills with them. What was later revealed to a patient, expectant and obviously cheated electorate was an electoral dish of epicurean proportions.

Fast forward a couple of years and we have a government that is a curious contraption borne out of insidious compromise. Totally ignoring the will of the people, marathon negotiations concocted a witch's brew of the stale variety. How true the adage that we get the leaders we deserve rings. The half-baked administration that is running Zimbabwe, if we may call it that, has been misfiring on all cylinders.

It is in this regard that the Zimbabwean experience should hold lessons for the incoming coalition government of the Conservatives and the Liberal Democrats. It has all the trappings of Zimbabwe's Government of National Unity (GNU) or ‘Inclusive Government' as they choose to call it. It is a product of a political crisis and is therefore a marriage of convenience.

If you look at it from all angles, it is an awkward, to quote Professor Welshman Ncube, ‘half human, half beast.' You have on the one hand the Movement for Democratic Change - Tsvangirayi which won an election but not enough for it to control government, and Zanu PF, the former ruling party that gate-crashed after losing the elections. Then of course the MDC Mutambara faction that could not even dream of being at the table. There are no prizes for guessing which one of these is the beast.

The gist of the questions at the Cameron-Clegg press conference on the lawns of Downing Street clearly showed this. Who would field question time, chair cabinet meetings etcetera. They should ask how Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirayi has fared against a belligerent President Robert Mugabe who will not hesitate to remind everyone within earshot who is in charge. His Excellency the President, Head of State and Commander of the Defence Forces runs the country and the rest of you can frankly go to hell.

Another interesting result of the ‘historic' coalition in the UK is the fact that a whole host of politicians who previously could only dream of being in government were thrown in at the deep end. The Liberal Democrats managed to get 5 seniors cabinet posts and at least 15 as junior ministers. The question is whether they could swim. In Zimbabwe, senior members from both factions of the former opposition Movement for Democratic Change (MDC) found themselves in ministerial positions that seemed more of largesse that deserved.

The obvious result has been the preponderance of lame duck cabinet ministers whose claim to fame is being at the right time at the right place with the right people. I'm afraid there is little here worth writing home about except perhaps Finance minister Tendai Biti and State Enterprises and Parastatals' Gorden Moyo who apart from standing their ground evidently know how a government should be run. The net result was gross incompetence among those who could not fit the bill and were booted out in a ‘reshuffle' by the Prime Minister Tsvangirayi recently.

While the Lib Dems are still pinching themselves, the question that Britons should be asking is whether they have the right people for the complex job of steering the country from economic disaster and a war they were not supposed to be involved in? Soon, just like a wedding, the novelty of union will soon wear off as it did in Zimbabwe a year ago. When reality sinks in that is when the dirt hits the fan. I suppose Britain has better prospects at calling for early elections than Zimbabwe.

As we speak, the tone coming from Harare on both sides of the political divide, and so eloquently and loudly pronounced by Deputy Prime Minister Prof Arthur Mutambara, is that there won't be elections in Zimbabwe any time soon. Not if the MDC guys comfortably ensconced on the gravy train can help it. While the Britons are admiring their new toy, Zimbabweans both at home and abroad have to face some hard truths about a Lib Dem-Conservative coalition government, what one UK paper called brilliantly dubbed, Con-Dem-nation.

The views of both parties on immigration are well known. While the Conservatives (and Labour) advocated for the deportation of illegal immigrants and putting a cap on non-EU immigrants because they felt that they are swamping the country's services, the Liberal Democrats pledged to offer illegal immigrants a lifeline in the form of an amnesty. This explains why a lot of Zimbabweans and other immigrants in the UK backed the Lib Dems.

However, the coalition agreement seems to reflect the conservative position of limiting non-EU immigrants although it puts an end to child detention in immigration centres. It goes without saying therefore, that the new government is likely to get tough on asylum seekers. This would be bad news to the thousands of illegal immigrants who have been in the UK for years. Whether it was time for our relatives to start packing their bags or not, it's all up to fate.

It has come to my notice that there is a discernable level of excitement among Zimbabwean politicians each time there are elections in the UK. The hope, particularly within Zanu PF, is that it might bring a shift in foreign policy and a possible lifting of the ‘Harrods shopping spree' ban they are labouring under. If there is one thing blacklisted Zanu PF politicians hate is cooling their heels at Heathrow Airport departure lounge on transit while their MDC counterparts paint London red.

With William Hague heading the foreign ministry I suggest they look elsewhere for relief in this regard. The Conservatives might have given us our independence all those years back, but these Conservatives of today are a different kettle of fish. Hague has not hidden his apparent distaste for Zanu PF as are many of his compatriots. For those with short memories, he is the one who advocated for the evacuation of British kith and kin from Zimbabwe at the height of the disastrous land invasions.

As for Zimbabweans who had found sanctuary with their former colonial masters, the signs are there that the coalition government is not what they expected. Not that they are packing their bags and rushing for the border. The climate of unease is shown by the growing number of enquiries about opportunities in Botswana, Swaziland, Namibia or even, God-forbid, South Africa. Some are talking investment while others are preparing to make a move.

Only time will tell as to where the policies of new occupants of Whitehall will trigger a mass exodus of Babylonian proportions by Zimbabweans ensconced there.  Though the rumblings are becoming audible, the vast majority are sure to give their forsaken homeland a wide berth. Not at moment when the inclusive government is still clutching at empty straws as far as finding solid financial backing for their experiment is concerned.

One thing that Zimbabwean diasporians are unanimous about though is the fact that only free and fair elections will bring about finality to the crisis that is there. The challenge is that of politicians, ideologues and indeed demagogues who would like the status quo to prevail. Because any other arrangement would mean a sure end to their access to the largesse associated with political power. In the meantime, the Lib Dem-Conservative coalition is not offering any better options either.

About the Author

Lenox Mhlanga is a Zimbabwean columnist based in Botswana. he writes on topics rangng from politics, travel, society, economics and anything that meets his fancy. He has a creer spanning 20 years in public relations, journalism, broadcasting and teaching. He is currently editing and writing on a freelance basis and in the process of writing a book. You can contact him at lenoxmhlanga@hotmail.com and he has a blog at http:/lenoxmhlanga.blogspot.com

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